Why Do Spouses Stay Together in Troubled Marriages?

 Posted on January 13, 2025 in Divorce

Over time, marriages can run aground on rocky shores. Adversity and arguments are normal in a marriage, and conflict resolution is foundational for a strong relationship. However, when a marriage reaches a point of stagnation or coldness, some spouses may decide to stay together even if divorce might seem like an appealing option. The reasons for this are complex, varying from couple to couple, and sometimes, it serves their long-term interests to stay together even if the relationship feels distant.

If you find yourself in a troubled marriage, a Joliet, IL family law attorney can serve as a source of counsel, providing legal advice and representation whether you decide to remain married or get a divorce. At Law Offices of Tedone and Morton, P.C., our attorneys are ready to advocate for your desired outcome, bringing our full knowledge of the law to each case.

Benefits

Even when a relationship turns stale, many couples opt to stay together for the mutual benefits of marriage. A couple filing jointly on their tax returns can reap significant savings compared to filing separately, which is why many couples going through a divorce opt to file their last tax return together. Furthermore, it is common for spouses to make use of each other’s employer benefits, incentivizing them to stay together.

Some may see this as a pragmatic view of marriage, but if the benefits outweigh the costs, a couple may find comfort in remaining together for the perks.

Family Considerations

When spouses become parents, there may be newfound pressure to stay together for the sake of the children. This is not always the healthiest justification – in some cases, a child may be better off growing up in a household with less conflict – but there may be some valid considerations. For instance, parents may opt to stay together until their child graduates from high school or college, once they become empty nesters.

Waiting until the child reaches the age of emancipation can also neatly resolve issues of child custody and visitation, as the adult child at that point can make decisions on his or her own.

Convenience

Divorce can be an incredibly tedious process. Depending on whether a couple can agree on asset division, spousal support, and other relevant issues, the dissolution of a marriage can take months or even years to resolve. Thus, it should come as no surprise that spouses stick together in "dead" marriages just to avoid the trouble. On top of that, spouses will have to make new living arrangements, with one or both spouses moving out of the marital home.

The choice to remain married is sometimes less about preserving the relationship and more about not wanting to deal with divorce. If a married couple can tolerate each other’s presence and provide support when needed, staying together may be an ideal option. However, options like mediation or collaborative divorce can significantly cut down on the time and cost of ending the marriage.

Meet With a Joliet, IL Family Law Attorney

If you are unsure about the state of your marriage and are caught between staying together or divorcing, a Will County, IL family law attorney at the Law Offices of Tedone and Morton, P.C. can serve as a source of guidance. To schedule a free consultation with our firm today, call our offices at 815-666-1285.